sewing with survivors

When I first began working with survivors of human trafficking, domestic violence, and abuse through the Creativity Shell, I never imagined how deeply sewing would become a language of healing. What started as a way to teach a life skill slowly transformed into a sacred space where survivors could begin to feel safe, express themselves, and rebuild.

Sewing with survivors is not the same as teaching a typical sewing class. Every tool, every fabric, and every stitch must be approached with intention and empathy. Over the years, I’ve learned lessons, sometimes the hard way, about how to create a space that truly supports healing and safety. If you're working in a similar space or ever plan to, I want to share a few important things to keep in mind.

1. Be Mindful of Objects That Can Cause Harm

Sewing involves scissors, rotary cutters, pins, and other sharp tools. In protected spaces such as shelters, it is critical to ensure these tools are always accounted for, stored safely, and never left unattended. I’ve worked in shelters where every item had to be signed in and out, and for good reason. What feels like a regular sewing supply to one person can be a source of danger or temptation to another who is struggling or triggered.

2. Avoid Religious or Potentially Traumatic Prints

Certain symbols or religious imagery can be triggering, especially to survivors who have been manipulated or abused in the name of religion. Be cautious with your fabric selection and ask before offering prints with crosses, scripture, or cultural symbols. What may seem like a beautiful fabric to you could be a painful reminder to someone else. When in doubt, offer neutral or abstract prints, and always give survivors the freedom to choose what feels safe to them.

3. Rethink the Project Itself

Scarves, for example, are popular beginner sewing projects, but they can also be used for self-harm or as tools of violence. Be thoughtful about the emotional and physical implications of the projects you choose. The goal is healing and empowerment, so prioritize projects that feel grounding, safe, and confidence-building.

4. Consider the Function of the Final Product

I’ve had moments where I thought making tote bags would be a great project until I realized that in a shelter, a bag can quickly become a means to run away. While we want to offer functional, empowering projects, we also have to be honest about where we are teaching. Talk with the shelter staff and consider the emotional and practical consequences of each project before moving forward.

5. Avoid Street Colors or Gang-Related Prints

Colors matter. In some communities, specific colors or combinations are connected to gangs or street life. Even if a student isn’t actively involved, those colors can represent a past they’re trying to escape or a world they’ve lost someone to. Be thoughtful and ask before assigning or offering color-based materials.

6. Listen to the Person in Front of You

More than anything, listen. Survivors are the experts of their own lives. If someone tells you that they don’t like a certain fabric or want to change a project, let them. If they want to talk, listen. If they want silence, honor it. The act of sewing can be deeply personal and often brings up memories, emotions, and truths. Be present, but don’t take over. This is their time, not yours.

7. Don’t Cry

This is one of the hardest things I had to learn. When a survivor opens up to you and their story feels too heavy, don’t cry. Tears can shift the focus from their experience to your reaction. Survivors often carry shame or guilt and seeing someone cry can make them feel like a burden. If you need to cry, do it later, privately. In the moment, be their strength. Your job is to hold space, not to fill it with your own sorrow.

Sewing with survivors has changed my life. It has taught me more about patience, strength, and grace than any degree or curriculum ever could. At the Creativity Shell, we believe in the power of creating with purpose. When that purpose is healing, we must approach every thread with compassion and every class with humility.

To those who teach in these spaces, thank you. To the survivors who allow us into your journey, we are honored.